The cost of denial

The only reason I can think of for people to deny, deny, deny, the prevalence of sexual assault in our society is because they’re too scared.

They are scared that if it’s true and if they admit the reality, then they, their friends, their loved ones are no longer safe and dammit, they might actually feel compelled to do something about it!

I suppose I can’t blame people for wanting so desparately to feel safe, because once you admit the truth that you have a 20-25% chance of being a victim of sexual assault and that so many people you know and care about have already been assaulted, it is actually harder to get out of bed everyday and walk the streets because of the fear and the disgust and the disappointment in humanity.

If this applies to you, I hope you think long and hard about your denial. I hope you realize just how badly it hurts, how strongly your questioning stings those of us who have gone through it. I hope you do your research and educate yourself before you take up another insensitive debate with another survivor. Before you cause someone else to relive the victimization and question themselves and the years of re-education, of therapy, of activism that it took to recognize that they were not at fault for the wrongs done upon them.


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